Snow removal made easy

Two signs that I have lived in Minnesota for far too long:

1.  The other night during the drive home in the snow, I was bitching about everyone driving too slow.

2.  I developed a new technique for removing snow from my car without using a brush or scrapper.

I make it a point to always try to remove all the snow from my car before I head out on the road.  Its partially because I like to be able to see where I am going, but there is another reason.  When people don't clear of the snow before driving, the snow will fall off on the road.  That means more snow removal.  Which means more money and more taxes to pay for the removal.  So every time I see a car with a foot of snow on the roof, I think to myself, that they are, very minutely, increasing my taxes and I hate them for it.  

So as I said, I try to clean off my car before leaving, but sometimes I don't have the time to patiently use the brush to clean everything off, so I go to plan B.  My preferred technique has been the G-Force Accelerator technique, where I will find an empty part of the parking lot at work, start driving quicker and quicker in a circle, until I create enough velocity to pull the snow off the car.  Think back to Roger Moore's face in "Moonraker" - yeah, that is the idea.  Usually it works, but it requires having a big enough and open enough spot to start your spin.

Last night, I tried a new technique, the Escape Velocity model.  In this situation, I find an open patch of road, accelerate, and then slam on the brakes, hoping the snow will be launched from the hood of my car.  Two problems I discovered with this method.  

1.  Antilock breaks work really well in a Volvo to prevent this type of behavior

2.  What snow that was removed from the hood was replaced by snow from the roof

So, I will be sticking with the aforementioned G-Force model.   I have problems with people dumping snow on the city streets.  I don't have the problem with my employer.

Happy driving