Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Happy Freak Day


Today is the quad-annual "celebration" of February 29th, aka Leap Day, or as I like to think of it, Freak Day. February 29th is the proverbial left handed, red-headed step child of days, celebrated only once every four years. Unless the year is the last in a century (e.g. 1900), where we don't have a leap day, except if that year can be evenly divided by 400 (e.g. 2000) in which case we do.

Confused? You should be.

This is why this day is the freakiest of all in the calendar year. But beyond its schizophrenic appearance in our calendars, it is a reminder of man's insignificance in the cosmos and our inability to shape our world. Just like hurricanes, tsunamis and earthquakes, Leap Day is a reminder of how little control we have over the universe. The earth does not rotate in an easily divisible number of days, so we have Leap Day to retain order. Leap Day is a reminder that the universe does not bend to our rules. Mankind has put together a "system" with clever workarounds that attempt to put "order" into the universe.

Bullocks I say.

Rather then put a facade of "order" on our world, I think February 29th should be a chance to embrace disorder and our puny attempts to control our world. Let anarchy reign this one day every 4 years (or so). It will be like Pon Farr is for Vulcans; it will be a day where we are allowed to have a release from all the rules and conformity we put up with the rest of the year.

I say, on this day, all order and rules should be abandon and lets celebrate the fact that we really aren't in control of our world. People should be free to do what they want with no repercussions; it will be a clearing house day for all the pent up anxiety we have to endure to be part of society. On this day, do the things you always wanted to do, like
  • Drive on the wrong side of the road
  • Run with scissors
  • Pee into the wind
  • Cut the tag off your mattress
  • Eat paste
Do all the things you want to do but "society" says you can't. Enjoy your freedom for this one day and celebrate the fact that you really are not in control of your world. Don't worry; "order" will resume on March 1.

Happy Freak Day!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

SquirrelBook: My offer to you


So it hit me today.

I was thinking about all the talk about Facebook's planned Initial Public Offering (IPO). Estimates for the valuation range between $80 - 100 billion. Billion. As in three commas. US dollars, not Zimbabwe dollars. All for a site that just connects people together and changes its appearance (to its detriment) and shares your most personal information (although they said they would not).

That is when it hit me. For ease of math, lets split the difference on Facebook's valuation at $90 billion. As of December 2011, there were 840 million users. Again, for ease of math, lets say that has grown in the past month and half, so round it up to 900 million users. At $90 billion, that works out that Facebook is making $1000 for every user they have. $1000 per person to Zuckerburg and other Facebook owners, all for sharing your personal details, photos, likes, dislikes and connection to your friends. For all that you give, Facebook users get nothing, aside from an onslaught of poorly conceived ads and the possibility of having your privacy invaded and identity hacked. This hardly seems fair.

I think it is time to propose a different arrangement. Instead of others profiting from your privacy, I think users should be the one who profits. I am proposing a new social media site - lets call it SquirrelBook, which I would like you to join. We would ask you share some information, but only as much as you are comfortable doing. Use fake names and create an alternate identity if you like. Once we get enough of a critical mass, we will have an IPO, at which time, I promise to give every member a share of the proceeds.

Now, because I am not asking for as much personal information, the valuation will be lower. Lets say, it is half as good as Facebook's, so $500 a person. At a 50-50 split, that would be $250 to you. Heck, I don't want to be greedy - in order to get folks to sign up, I'll reduce my cut to 10%. You will get $450.

Since you now have a choice in your social network platform, lets compare the potential IPOs and the benefit to you:

Facebook: All your information is shared and you are automatically opted in to any changes that occur. In return you get nothing and Facebook makes $1000 off of you.

SquirrelBook: Limited information shared and the creation of alternate identities is encouraged. In return you get $450.

I think the choice is clear. We look forward to seeing you on SquirrelBook.