Wednesday, March 10, 2010

People


I don't understand people.

I never have, and I probably never will.

People do things and act in ways which make absolutely no sense to me. I struggle understanding why they do what they do, what their motivations are, or what need is being met by acting the way they do.

I would like people to make sense. I would find studding and and observing human behavior highly entertaining, if it was not so real. Airports, shopping malls and restaurants for me are some of the great places to see human behavior in its most raw and uncensored form. If it was socially acceptable for me to sit alone at one of these locations and just observe, record and analyse interactions and report my findings, I would. Unfortunately, unless you are funded by a university or some private enterprise, I think that type of behavior classifies you as a "creepy guy".

Lately I have been observing a lot of behavior I would call intentional rudeness. I have no other way to describe it other than seeing behavior that would be considered rude, but for no apparent gain or benefit. Yet, it continues to go on.

I have been spending a lot of time lately in some of my favorite people watching locations - airports and shopping malls. I would think that in these environments there would be a desire for greater efficiency; you have a place to go, so people should be motivated to get to the gate, or the next store, quickly and move on. I would think this would cause people to be more observant of their environment, so they can move and adjust quickly to crowds to cause the least possible disruption or delays to themselves. This is not, however, the case.

Next time you are out in a crowded location like this, watch and you will see people intentionally getting in the way of others. It is the strangest thing. This is not a case of people who are unwilling to move or give way; this is people deliberately getting in the way of others just to slow them down. The faster or more purposefully one person seems to go, the more the crowd wants to slow them down, and for the life of me, I don't know why. Why would anyone intentionally inconvenience others, without any apparent personal gain? It takes time and energy on the part of the interrupter, so why this is happening makes no sense to me whatsoever.

The only reason I can come up with is there must be some latent sense of satisfaction it comes from inflicting unhappiness on another person. Again - I don't know why. I guess that some people feel so beat up and worn down in their day, the only way they have to restore their ego to equilibrium would be to try to exert some superiority over some other person, even a stranger. But does that work? I don't see how. If person A is victimized by person B, how does A feel better by causing an inconvenience to person C? I don't get it. How does inflicting a temporary inconvenience on a stranger make you feel better about getting beat up by someone else? And if person C follows the same pattern, then wouldn't that mean they would take it out on another unknown person, D, and so on, and so forth. Would it not be better to address the situation with person B, and stop the cycle before it begins? Certainly it would be more efficient, and I imagine more satisfying to get to the source.

For those of you who have studied human behavior and know more than me, I'm curious to know why this goes on. Until it is stopped, I am going to do my best to pay it forward.

Have a good day.

2 comments:

bmr said...

You’re describing classic abusive mentality. When person A feels victimized by person B, they do, in fact, find relief in taking their frustration out on person C. Two things going on: first, to beat themselves up would be too painful. Second, their entire sense of self is dependent on what they see reflected back ni other people (classic narcissism). In order to continue to feel ok about themselves, they need to knock the people around them down. It doesn’t make sense to a normal person, because normal people have an internally driven sense of self. I guess that makes you normal. :)

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