Saturday, December 12, 2009

Coming this Fall: Namaste, the TV Series


Last weekend, I went to the yoga studio in downtown Minneapolis. I like to yogasize occasionally in winter. I like the workout, but I also like all the drama. I am always amazed that for all the talk of inner peace, there is a lot of competition going on in the studio. Judgements abound: what type of matt do you use, where does your clothing come from, what brand of water bottle do you have, etc.

The class was predominantly female - probably 50 women in total - who could be divided into a few stereotypes, the most notorious being the Amazonian women. The Amazonians exhibit three traits: they are all very tall, very thin, and very competitive. They wear clothing to show off their ripped midsection and tramp stamps. Those without stamps typically haven't shaved their underarms lately; usually, but not always. They parade their toned physique and demand maximum space for their mats in their ritual of more-flexible-and-holier-than-thou in their fight to the top of the social pecking order. They try to intimidate what I call the normal woman, who are very nice and pleasant, and who are trying not to feel self-consciousness about wearing spandex. The there were the men. There were 13 were guys in the class, eight of which were definitely homosexual and three of whom were possibly. Nine of the guys were not wearing shirts; four of them should have been. Typically, they were much friendlier, though most of that was because they were looking for dates.

It was in the midst of all this drama, it hit me: This would be a great TV show.

Imagine a comedy set at a Yoga studio. I see it being a half-hour situation comedy. Think "Will and Grace" in a yoga studio. The drama and cattiness that have made reality shows like Project Runway and the Real Housewives such hits is all here, and it is ripe for the mocking. I just can't believe this has been picked on yet. It is somewhat formulaic, but it is one that works. It reunites that great comic pair - gossipy women and gay men.

I see the main characters would be:

Amy: Owner of the studio. Always trying to help her friends but her good intentions always fall short in execution, with hilarious results. Hopeless in love with Todd and devoutly loyal and supportive of her friends.

Todd: Amy's boyfriend and part time manager of the studio. He is putting him self through Medical School, and is somewhat skeptical of the some of the claims made by yoga practitioners, but he is deeply in love with Amy.

Electra: Alpha-female instructor. Obsessive in her quest to be the best and will do anything to stop those who challenge her. Sexually ambiguous - attracted to anyone who is hot and that she can dominate.

Blake: Flamboyantly gay, superficial, Man-ho of the yoga studio. Not particularly fit, but his humor and search for men keeps people coming back to his classes. He likes teaching beginner lady classes, so he can feel better about his chances with men.

Efren: The shy, gay, male instructor, who is approaches his yoga practice with respect and reverence. Very dedicated to his craft and wants to help others reach yoga enlightenment. The straight man to Blake's comic foil. Desperately looking for his true love.

Gary: Accountant who works next door; Does not believe in yoga nor particularly like the studio, but too timid to do anything about it. Think Lundergard from "Fargo"

The show will is set in Minneapolis. Why? Only three shows have taken place here: Mary Tyler Moore, Little House on the Prairie, and Coach, being the last one. We could make up a lot of jokes about the competition between Minneapolis and St. Paul. Since most people have never lived in either one, we could make up a lot of stuff. Plus, the idea of having a hot yoga class in a climate that is really cold makes me laugh.

Action takes place primarily in the Yoga studio. The series premier would focus on introducing the characters and the drama between Amy and Todd and their feelings about Yoga. Amy wants to open up the benefits of yoga to others, while Todd just considers it a cult. Other episode ideas include:

Ladies Only Classes: Amy gets the idea that they need to offer women only classes, to attract more women and make they feel more comfortable. Only problem is Electra is teaching them, and her alpha-instincts and belittling behavior make the women feel only worse. Blake doesn't like the idea and starts offering men-only classes to bring in more date prospects for himself.

Hot Yoga Intro: Efren gets the idea that they need to have a week of free hot yoga classes to get more people to try it out. It helps bring in business, but the only problem is most of the folks who show up are homeless people, who are looking to get out from the cold.

I think it will be a hit. Anyone who who has contacts in the business and is interested in representing me, drop me a line.

Namaste

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