Stupid

I should have known it before I left my home this morning. I should have seen the warning signs, but I didn't. I had gone and made myself stupid.

I am not sure how it happened, or when exactly it happened, but it happened. The day started normally enough, I woke up, read in bed for a while (though I had trouble focusing on what I was reading), got up and made breakfast. Sometime between waking up and leaving home a few hours later, my transformation became complete: I have become a complete and total, mouth-breathing idiot.

After breakfast, I lounged in front of the TV, watching reruns of "Firefly" a series that I only partially liked, and one I could borrow to watch anytime I wanted (note: my friend Amy loaned me "Firefly" and the movie "Serenity" and I had them at home for over a year, before I watched either one. So yes, when I say I was only mildly interested in watching it, I really mean it). But, as lukewarm as I was to the series originally, it was on TV now, which meant I didn't have to choose. Plus, since I had seen the whole series, that meant I didn't need to think about a new plot (warning sign #1).

Worse, I was not really watching, but kinda listening. I will turn on the TV for some background noise, especially if I have a task to do. However, today's "task" was playing games on the iPad. Not a thinking game, like "Scrabble" (d@mn all my opponents - I have been waiting for your move since last night. you could have helped save me by making me think!). No, I played, Solitaire, one of the more mindless games out there. Yes, there is some thinking and strategy, but not much. On the scale of intellectual ability, playing Solitaire is the equivalent of Patrick the Starfish. At this point, I was basically at the level of a mouth breather (warning sign #2).

The real coup de grace, was when I decided to finally leave home to run some errands. I managed to shower and dress myself relatively easily, but when it came to locking up, that is where the problems really started: I forgot how to lock my door.

I knew the key went into the funny hole, that has groves, but I forgot which way to turn it to lock the door. Odd. It has been the same door I have lived in for 11 years. Same key, too. It is something I do at least once a day (usually more), so I have gone through this same process over 4000 times on this door alone. Even more times if you count other locks I have encountered. Still, I was mystified about how to turn the key to lock the door. This is made even sadder in that even if I didn't know, there was still a 50-50 chance I would get it right.

What is the cause? Not sure. I have had spontaneous bouts of stupidity before (once I forgot how to turn on the washing machine. honestly. I stared at the controls and I could not remember which one made the water flow and the thing with the things move quickly). Sometimes it is caused by a cold; I did have a bit of a snot buildup, but nothing bad. Sometimes work: I was a busy week and I did work late last night, but I got to the gym and had a great workout. Personally, I do have a lot of things going on today, and that I need to do this weekend, that have been top of mind. It is one of the reasons I don't like to plan my weekends; I need time to rest the brain cells.

Whatever it is, I don't like it. There is a lot to do, that I need to get done, but all my mind can do right now is think about, um, .... well, the fact that I really shouldn't be behind the wheel of a car. Hopefully this will pass but in case it doesn't, my apologies to anyone I interact with over the next few days. I will do my best to control my mouth breathing.

Happy thinking.